PdLR's Thought for the Day

When God made man, He made the order of things pretty clear: the head is over the heart, which is over the sex organ. Why is it that I know a lot of people who seem to spend most of their time upside down?

Random Dedication: Short and Bittersweet

Goodbye.

PdLR's Thought for the Day

Theory of Assumptions:

When we don't know how a person will react to a situation, we often assume that they will react the same way we would.

Random Dedications: Sentimentality

1. I have come to get used to your presence. I have become accustomed to the sound of your voice, the warmth of your company, and the tenderness of our friendship. Thank you for letting me find solace in your listening ear and comfort in your patient understanding. I know we don't always see eye to eye, but I have long begun to need you as a staple for my day to day living. It's not that I can't live without you. I am a separate entity from you, after all. But, without you, I will find it difficult to live, being so used to your presence. Always take care of yourself.
   
   
2. These past weeks, I am quite sure that you're aware of how much I miss you. I know I'm becoming (or perhaps long been) a burden to you. I'm sorry for my dependence on you. I am weak without the people that I care about and, therefore am weaker without you, seeing that I care for you so deeply. I rely on you because, to me, you are a pillar of strength. You may scoff because we both know that you are only human and also weak, so I offer my meagre strength to you as well. I will always be here for you, though I have so little to offer. Please do not lose yourself. Do not push yourself too hard.
   

PdLR's Thought for the Day

"It's human to be indecisive. It's divine to make a choice."

..........

HAPPY FOURTH ANNIVERSARY TO IVAN AND ME!!!

PdLR's Thought for the Day

Never try to grab a frightened cat.

PdLR's Thought for the Day

The funny thing about life is you rarely feel like you're doing something big, but when you look back to where you were a year ago, you realize that you've gotten pretty far from where you once were (where you go is another story).

I guess that's what New Year Celebrations are for: it's an excuse to look back to where you once were.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

You know what I hate about you? (dLR version)

Yeah, there is one entry for each of you. Take your pick as to which one is yours. You're all wonderful people, so I hope no one finds this offensive.

You know what I hate about you? I hate it that...

1. ...you're too far away.
2. ...you underestimate yourself and your worth.
3. ...I'm not too sure if I still know you.
4. ...you put too much angst in your life. (keyword:"put")
5. ...you always expect a "cleaning crew" to arrive. (you'll figure this out)

A Prosperous and Productive New Year is awaiting you, I hope we all manage to take advantage of it. I miss you all so much! Love you! Hugs and kisses for all of you!

SORRY FOR BAILING ON YOU THE LAST TIME...

You know what I hate about you? (Katipips version)

Something to read before the new year begins. There will be one entry for each Katipip. Since I'm a chicken-wuss, I won't put in the names. Just look for the one, which is most applicable to you.

So, here we go!

You know what I hate about you? I hate it that...

1. ...we don't know each other very well.
2. ...you're so busy.
3. ...you don't realize your worth.
4. ...you're too impulsive.
5. ...you're far too nice. (all saints are dead, ya know?)
6. ...you're too damn cynical.
7. ...you keep far too much bottled in.
8. ...you don't realize that you have the potential to kick ass.
9. ...you often become obsessed with the wrong set of details. (yeah, I know, so do I)

Not even Ivan knows which one is his and it will take some serious compelling to make me tell. A Prosperous and Productive New Year to you guys! I love you all!

INUMAN TAYO MINSAN...MAY MGA GUSTO AKONG LASINGIN...

PdLR's Thought for the Day

What's in a name?

I Just Want to Share This...

Wow.

I'm sorry, I'm at a loss for words. Ivan and I just had a wonderful date. It was amazing! I'm still giggling like a schoolgirl at the memory. I feel guilty for dragging him to a restaurant that was more expensive than I imagined, though. And I must make a note that Palermo, the flourless chocolate cake, is too rich to be eaten by only two people. It was a small cake, but Ivan and I almost puked trying to finish it (we didn't get to finish it, actually). It was decadent, but it was too decadent. It was good, of course! Pasto is a great restaurant, just a tad bit too upscale to be affordable.

We were planning on watching a movie, but all the Eastwood cinemas were playing King Kong (which was a movie neither of us cared to see), so we spent the time talking and bonding.

I know, that might sound boring, but I'm a person who enjoys conversation, so sue me.

That's it, I guess. I just had to get that out.

**smiiiile**

Dream: Hey, guess who died!

Uh... yeah, it's one of my death dreams. Dreams are peculiar, I know. It's just fun keeping track of them. This one is uncharacteristically short since I can't remember the other details.

We were out, the Katipips and myself. Well, not all the Katipips, just the usual suspects: Ivan, Ralph, Rey, Alen, Phoebe, Leonard, and myself. Dinner at McDo, as usual. Nothing was out of place until discussion about what was happening with everyone else came up. I think I asked Leonard what was happening with Rene and Ralph looked at me in disbelief.

"Hindi mo alam na matagal na siyang patay?" the matter-of-fact manner in which Ralph said it gave me the chills. Then, I woke up.

Err... Ice cream, anyone?

PdLR's Thought for the Day

Smart people aren't any more complicated, they're just better at hiding their simplicity.

Ceremony and Celebration

I'm not the most religious person you'll find in the world, though I am very much interested in learning about Catholicism. I'm not exactly a devout Catholic and I would be kidding myself if I ever claimed I am an expert in my chosen religion. But, I like to think that I am faithful. I like to think that despite my shortcoming as a Catholic-Christian, I am a Christian and a blossoming one at that. This is why I make no claims that what I am writing here is correct, but what I am writing here is out of concern and a strange sense of sympathy.

I am not an expert, but I believe I am entitled to give a commentary on what I have observed and experienced for the mere fact that I am one of the flock.

One of the down sides of being in a predominantly Catholic country is the large population in parishes. Large populations mean less focus on the individual people in the parish. The church becomes less like the small portion of the family of God and more like an obligatory meeting place to conduct ceremony. Gone are the days when the people who say "Peace be with you" to you during mass mean it with all their hearts because they know you and they do mean you well. We tend to hear mass beside strangers. While the idyllic setting would be that we could see each other as brothers and sisters despite the fact that we are strangers to each other, it almost never happens. You see this when we sing the Lord's Prayer and the priest says "As one family, let us pray in the words Jesus has taught us" (or some other variation of it) and people don't hold hands with those they don't know. You feel this barrier between people during the sharing of peace when all people give those around them are nods and forced smiles.

I never minded these things before. It was something I had come to accept long ago. As the population of members of the church grows, the percentage of the faithful drops. As long as the people still showed something that resembled concern for one another, at least during mass, then the concept of "one church" isn't completely lost.

Last night, however, I felt sad during Sunday mass. Celebration is defined as a joyful occasion for special festivities to mark a special event. During celebrations, you see people involved in it. You see the people participating in it. Celebrations were meant for the people, not the event holders. When a birthday celebrant holds a party, he holds it so he can be with the people and enjoy the day with these people. When we celebrate the mass, the celebrant conducts it not for himself or for Jesus (I hardly think they need it), but for the people. The holy mass is the Celebration of the Holy Sacrifice. Key word here being: celebration.

I won't say what church I went to, and I will try to describe it in the most general sense. It was a beautiful church with a grand hall filled with grandiose images, golden adornments, and a lot of people. I was even thrilled and humbled when I saw the miter on the celebrants head. A bishop would be celebrating mass with us. And while I already attended a mass celebrated by a pope, I am still honored when I encounter officials of the church. Don't ask me why, that's just how I am.

As the processional hymn was sung, I heard the bishop singing along with the choir. The song was popular enough and I was singing along with it, but a majority of the people weren't. The bishop was waving his hand, trying to get the people to sing along with him, but to no avail. Throughout the mass, people didn't respond during the responsorial psalm, the choir sang alone during the different hymns, and had to constantly be cued by the commentator as to when they should stand, sit, or kneel. The bishop's homily was good, but the entire mass felt empty. It was ironic, really. The mass being all about relinquishing control of our lives to God and all around me, people were texting, fussing, talking to each other, and just plain not paying attention. I know I'm guilty of this, but I do my best not to let my mind wander.

I usually hear mass at the local mall. I was a bit relieved to hear mass at an actual parish because I imagined the people to be a bit more involved. How wrong I was. In the mall, the people sang more, they listened more, and even if they stood along the sidelines, they strained to be a part of the celebration. During my first few masses at that chapel, I found myself moved almost to tears during the Lord's Prayer because the entire lot seemed to be singing as one big family.

Ceremony is defined to be a formal event performed on a special occasion or an activity infused with ritual significance. The key word here is ritual. It is customary, traditional, and prescribed. It is not wrong to treat the mass as a ceremony, with formality and dignity and solemnity. It actually is a celebration that needs to be done with utmost respect and reverence. But it must not be something that we simply "go through" almost habitually. It's sad to watch people perform acts during the mass mechanically, out of habit. It loses its meaning in that way. I remember the bishop's sermon and how he said that we should look at the celebration of the mass in the Hebrew perspective. I can't recall his exact words, but I remember the essence being that celebrating something, reenacting it, isn't just going through the motions of it. It is making the people during the reenactment part of the act that happened so long before. It is connecting with the past.

I read the misalette's short reflection on the readings. As I recall the church we went to, I remembered a line where King David wants to build a temple for the Arc of the Covenant. The prophet Nathan tells him to do what he sees fit because God was with him, but God spoke to Nathan asking who was David to make him a house? I remember the reflection of the priest on that portion. That perhaps David thought that if he built a large and beautiful temple in honor of God, that God would be somehow indebted to David and so David could have a little more freedom with his actions.

A large and beautiful church and large offerings during the offertory are not substitutes for faith and obedience. That was made clear during the mass, had the people listened.

PdLR's Thought for the Day

Popular saying: Out of sight, out of mind.

Dream: The Woman in Black

How many time have I had very peculiar and seemingly symbolic dreams? Maybe I'm studying religion too much. I don't know what provoked this dream. Then again, most of my dreams that are of this sort rarely are triggered by something. This one rates high on the weirdness scale.

It appeared to be a regular day in my dream. It was a regular day in school where everyone was busy doing things in preparation for the current graduating batch's graduation. I remember seeing a lot of my orgmates there. Of course, the Katipips were there as well. We were manning a tiangge booth (for CS, I think). In the tiangge, there was a cooking contest that tried to see who could make this type of bread faster. Anyway, strange things began to happen in the dream when I looked into a mirror and pulled my hair across my face, using my hair as some kind of veil to cover my mouth and nose. I was surprised when my reflection changed to that of a beautiful woman dressed in black. Well, I'm not sure how beautiful she was because, like me, half of her face was covered by a veil (a real veil, not hair), but her eyes were incredible. I thought, at first, that the woman was perhaps my reflection. However, in the mirror, I saw a shadow behind the woman. I moved and the shadow moved, but the woman didn't. She only followed me with her eyes as I side-stepped from behind her. When I saw my own reflection, the woman covered her head in a large black cloth. I looked around the restroom and saw that I was alone. Throughout my dream, people kept discussing philosophical things with me. Every now and then, I would see my reflection on different surfaces, sometimes, a dark shadow was behind me, sometimes, I was alone. Everytime I saw the shadow, I would ask it, "Who are you? What do you want? Why don't you show yourself?" (Yes, I speak English in my dreams...) In the end, I returned to the restroom and stared at my reflection in the mirror. The shadow was there again. I demanded that it show itself to me and disembodied hands removed a black veil and under the veil was a grail. When I took the grail and opened it, it was filled with a foul smelling liquid and worms. The liquid filled the cup to the brim and a few drops spilled around the restroom sink. In my dream, I made a comment about how the disgusting mix was "the filth of humanity". I took a small container of what looked like red bugs and I carefully poured its contents into the grail. I even accidentally dropped the container, because I didn't want whatever was in it or in the grail to touch me. I tried to retrieve the container, but when I looked inside the grail, the bugs had already eaten up the bottom of the grail and the container. The foul smelling liquid and the worms were gone. The bugs disappeared as well, and the restroom was clean again. Then, I woke up.

I think I got the bugs from the series "Bones". Flesh eating beetles, I believe. Yes, I know, it's a strange dream. I get a lot of those.

Oh well...

Alumni Homecoming

Well, the much awaited 25th anniversary celebration/alumni homecoming of the organization happened last night. It was a night to remember, that's for sure.




My head's still spinning from everything that happened last night. I know most people would have much preferred the alumni count to be higher, but from the way things went for me last night, I can't say I'm one of them. I only hope everyone had fun. If I were to judge, there were points in the night when the majority was bored, but I hope they don't think the night was a complete waste. Then again, that's me.

... wait... this is me. I'm supposed to look at the bright and happy side, right?

I guess Rene's cynicism is contagious.

After the program a group of alumni from the same batch, I figure, arrived. It's always nice seeing people so happy to see each other. So much ceremony for these people, whom, I think, would have been content to find an excuse to see each other and relive their memories again. But, we did our best to establish ties with our alumni, whom we swore in as honorary members.

I hope we brought back a lot of wonderful memories. I'd like to think that we did.

So, despite the fact that my legs hurt from walking and standing all night, that my toes burned because of the odd structure of my shoes, and that my arms were a bit numb from the chills and slight fever I had, (to anyone who's wondering whether or not I'm complainaing: Yes, I am complaining!) with that mentality, it was all worth it (I mean this, too, of course). I just hope someone would do that for us twenty-five years from now.

Twenty-five years from now, I would like to sit and watch pictures of myself from twenty-five years back with friends whom I love. I would like to see the people I had not seen in years surround me in a place that would bring back a lot of memories. I think P300 (or whatever its equivalent at that time would be) is a small price to pay for that.

This is why quizzes are inaccurate

I took the very same test a few days ago. I was honest with my answers then and I still am honest with my answers now. I got different results, though. This is because most people encompass different stereotypes. A person cannot be summed with a few questions...

... but I like the pictures, so here's the result.



DEMURE BEAUTY - You are modest, innocent, and a bit
naive. You are naturally optimistic and always
look on the bright side in whatever you do.
People are naturally drawn to you and you
probably have a lot of friends. If you're sad,
which is rare, you bounce back quickly. Your
innocence makes you see the good in all things.
You believe in second chances and are a true
idealist.


What type of beauty do you possess? (20 questions + 7 results + pretty pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

PdLR's Thought for the Day

Fact of life: the people who do the dirty work are almost never recognized.

I'M SICK...